so i didnt eat a single thing today. and im not dead so farrrr.
i accidentally told my friend the sweetest pick up line ever. i started talking about solipsism (the belief that everything around you was created by your mind) and i went “If everything around me is all my imagination, then you’re the best thing I’ve come up with” she was speechless for a solid five minutes.
everything is a giveaway.
i search for friends that are level headed, and do not try to take advantage of their other friends.
Talking to yourself, also known as self-talk can be used to enhance task performance. There are two types of self talk: Instructional self-talk, for example, takes place when a person encourages themselves by muttering technical instruction to aid during the task at hand….
I remember when I asked you
"What would you do if you lost me, if If I left you. What would you do?"
And you said to me
"Why would you even make me want to think of that? I’m never going to loose you. Never. And if the situation happened, well you know what I’d do? I’d get you back. I’d text you all the time telling you I miss you and that I love you and if I saw you on the street I’d grab you and kiss you. Id send you letters telling you how much you mean to me and tell you how bad I’m doing without you. At night I’d sneak in and wrap my arms around you and beg for you back. Id do everything in this living world possible to show you my love for you. I just wouldn’t give up on you until you were mine again."
but the worst part of it was that a few month later
You were the one that left me
to me, there was nothing to fear.
i was just walking this ship through utter darkness.
fear was just an obstacle.
the true enemy was despair and misfortune.
just went to a weird nj spot.
i was just careful, and mindful of where i walked.
i guess im not superstitious. or maybe i just throw caution to the wind.
i used the word daring to describe it.
i was there to endure, and if there was anything.
well fuck it. i was ready to take it on.
whatever the fuck. i wasnt scared. or spooked. just kept an open eye for animals, with my improvised club at hand.
i have learned nothing deep from this shroom trip, except that i may be one of a specific type of vision. and that i should celebrate to myself this vision. many may share in it, but i am the holder of it.
my physical pains exist, though they’re temporarily and meagerly accumulating upon me. i shall find a source of relief somewhere.
the deeper causes i search for.
oh, sometimes it’s hard to find a soul who understands.